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Loz
12 November 2006 @ 04:38 pm
I've imagined the conversation a million times in my head, and some how I've managed to come up with a million ways they'll say "no". Most involve lauging in my face. I'm so scared. There has to be at least one way that they'll say yes, but I just cant see it. 

Im so over the fucking exams. I dont care if I fail. I dont care if every other person out there is smarter, and studying. I. DONT. CARE. English .... meh i can do it .... Science .... who gives? .... History .... passible .... Geo .... not a hope in the verse .... Math .... refer to geo ... 

My weekend sucked.

All exept the dance consert which was freaken awesome and I scored a free trophy. 

Im passed tired. Im passed caring. Im doing my HSC, then I'll care, coz i'll be doping things I WANT TO DO.

Yeah, as you can tell, my moods not the best right now.
 
 
Loz
12 November 2006 @ 02:56 pm
A pretty poem



 
 
Loz
04 November 2006 @ 02:58 pm
Yay! New layout! Though I can't seem to be able to see the background image ... so if any one knows how to make the background image show more I'd love to hear how! 
But other than that nothing much is happening.
Ballet concert in a week. 
Not ready. Haven't gotten my goals yet.
Exams in a week.
School is finnished in 2 weeks.
Can't wait.

Luv Loz xoo
 
 
Current Location: at my desk
i feel so: coldcold
 
 
Loz
25 October 2006 @ 02:00 pm
"When the emotion becomes too strong for speech  you sing; when it becomes too strong for song, you dance."
 
 
Loz
23 October 2006 @ 06:34 pm
Why can't I be normal? Why can't I cry?
It seems that every one has someone they can call on to help them through a hard time, and I have no-one. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends , they're all I have ... but I can't talk to them
I can't talk to any one. 
No-one would ever understand.
 
I can't take it any more. Im sick of every one, I laugh at the simplicity of their problems.  I wish I was better, I wish there was a cure. But there isn't, just learning to hide it, so they think Im better, and they leave me be. 
Dancing used to help, and maybe it still does, but now its so sreious, I can't just do it for fun. It's work-work-work, at home more than at the studio. And with school closing, stress is on, I cant get away.
I can never get away
Even Cinderella got some one ... her life sucked ... but who do I have? I can hear you reading this, thinking "You dumb fuck, open your eyes and see the friends you have ..." But no matter what you say, you shall never know, and even if you did, you could never understand. 
You'll never understand
And if you nod and pretend to, the rumour spreads ... and I know I can't trust you ... you'll "just tell one person" then they'll tell another .... and my life will be ruined ...
I hide it from you ... I learnt to hide it when I was first laughed at when I was three ... now its killing me ... slowly ... surely 

You'll never understand
 
 
i feel so: calmcalm
 
 
 
Loz
22 October 2006 @ 08:16 pm

From random sites

The colour screwed up .. sorry

 
 
i feel so: pissed, sad, shocked, annoyed
 
 
Loz
14 October 2006 @ 05:56 am
Hey guys!
So with the hols over I guess its time I showed my work ... here are my first lot of firefly and ballet icons!



 
 
Current Location: At my desk
i feel so: artisticartistic
im rockin to: All the small things ~ Blink 182
 
 
Loz
12 October 2006 @ 07:36 pm
Two reasons why Im NOT as crazy as you all seem to think


 
 
i feel so: distresseddistressed
 
 
Loz
12 October 2006 @ 09:12 am
It calls to me, day and night
Scaring me out of sleep, making me wish I'd never started this thing
Its lead weight hangs off me,
dragging me down
I can't stop even if I wanted to
People stare when I walk down the street, their whispers following me
"Unhealthy... dangerous ... beyond help ..."
I can't stand
mirrors, they freak me out, telling the truth I no longer want to hear
My bubble isolates me, keping me from the world,
No matter how
hard I try, how tired I become, It is always there, mocking me
It's laughter rings in my ears, stopping me from doing what is so tempting
I wish it would leave, but I know that's a
lie
Deep down I know I need it,
to get to where I
need to be
It helps me, pushes me, scares me away from what will drag me down,


But its unhealthy, scary and dangerous
 
 
i feel so: tiredtired
 
 
Loz
13 September 2006 @ 06:25 pm

My faviourate Dance qoutes! Its a long post, and some of them are repeated, so sorry about that. 
Luv Loz xoxo






 
 
Current Location: bedroom
i feel so: depresseddepressed
im rockin to: Evanessence ~ Going under